Holding It Together with a Paintbrush and a Pen: Creativity in the Chaos

Sometimes, in life, everything seems to be shifting at once. Right now, I’m standing in the eye of one of those storms. Our house is on the market, a major surgery is looming on August 5, and I’m starting a new business in AI publishing — all at the same time. It’s the kind of moment where fear and hope collide daily. Some days I feel strong. Other days I feel like I'm barely keeping it together.

But even in the midst of this whirlwind, there’s one thing that grounds me. It isn’t organization. It isn’t planning. It isn’t even optimism.

It’s creativity.

I paint. I write. I research odd corners of history. And somehow, that keeps me sane.  

Creativity Is More Than a Hobby — It’s a Lifeline

I’ve always believed that creating something — anything — is healing. And I’m not alone. There’s now a body of research backing what so many of us instinctively know: creativity is good for your brain, your body, and your spirit. Studies have shown that engaging in creative expression reduces cortisol levels (the stress hormone), improves mood, and even enhances immune system functioning — something I need now more than ever as I prepare for surgery.

More importantly, creativity brings me back to myself. It’s a space where time stops ticking so loudly. In the flow of a brushstroke or a sentence, I forget the unknowns ahead. I feel calm, curious, and focused.

When the World Feels Messy, I Paint

Painting has always been my private rebellion against stress. When I was young, I’d feel that a muse was standing beside me, guiding my hand.

Usually, I plan my art pieces carefully. That’s who I am. I work on them in Photoshop before they ever hit the canvas. But, sometimes I start a canvas with no plan, letting layers build organically. Other times, I revisit old pieces and add to them, as if I’m collaborating with my past self. I’m re-learning the art of setting myself free, which I had as a younger artist. And sure, I show in a few shows and sell some of my paintings, but, more importantly, the very act of painting lets me reclaim part of my day — even if the rest of it feels out of my hands.

Research and Writing Help Me Organize My Inner World

Oddly enough, another thing that brings me peace is research. I’m weird that way. Lately, I've been deep-diving into historical figures like Oswald Mosley — not because I love fascism (quite the opposite!) but because I want to understand how dangerous ideas take root in modern society. Exploring the past gives me insight into the present, and it also gives my mind something to chew on that isn’t our country going down the tubes, medical statistics or real estate updates.

Writing, meanwhile, is where I sort it all out. It’s where I can name the emotions I don’t always say out loud. It’s also where I feel useful. With the AI publishing business I’m launching, I get to shape words into stories, ideas into books — and that kind of creative building gives me hope.

When everything around me feels uncertain, writing helps me make sense of it — and sometimes, to make peace with the fact that I can’t make sense of everything.

If You’re Facing Your Own Storm, Try Making Something

Maybe you’re facing surgery. Or selling your house. Or saying goodbye to something, or someone. If you are, I want to tell you something I wish someone had told me:

You don’t need to solve everything right now. But you can still make something beautiful.

Create space for whatever creativity looks like for you — even if it’s just scribbling in a journal, doodling on a napkin, humming a song, or collecting pictures that inspire you. You don’t need a studio or a deadline. You just need ten minutes. A corner of calm.

Let yourself follow what brings color back into your life.

Painting My Way to Peace

There’s a painting I’ve been working on of the Grand Canyon — not quite finished, not quite right, but full of movement and light. That’s how I feel, too. Not done. Not perfect. But in motion.

Surgery will come. The house will (eventually) sell. The business will grow. And in the meantime, I’ll keep painting and writing, because that’s how I hold myself steady.

Creativity doesn’t fix everything. But it helps me breathe deeper, sleep better, and face the next day with a little more grace.

And for now — that’s enough.